"What have I done?!"
"How could I fail everyone....again?!"
These were the immediate thoughts in my head as I realized I could not push myself up from the ground in my latest snowboard crash. The thought that I had failed everyone was immediate and unwaivering. My family, my daughter, the atheltes and adults we train....I immediately felt like I had let everyone down. How am I going to train people? How am I going to do my part in my household? How am I going to hold my daughter?
This was the second time in my life with this same injury. The last time "THIS SUCKS" went through my head and then that was about it. I ended my snowboarding season that night with tequila and a few beers. I knew it would be a struggle but I was a single man who owned a business with no one to support but myself. Wow, was this time different. I have people that depend on me. A family, a staff, a clientele who I adore, and athletes I look forward to training daily.
At this point in my life failure is almsot a funny thing. You feel as if you have failed enough in life and that it's behind you buy then BAM it hits you like an acme anvil in a Looney Tunes cartoon.
SO failure has happened. Should I let it crush me? The obvious answer is no. As a human being we live life with certain risks. Obviously strapping a board to your feet, covered in wax, and riding down a mountain of snow and ice increases these risks. But at the same time it fuels my soul. The risk is worth the reward. It's the place that lets me decompress. It's the one thing I do that makes me completely happy. Outside of spending time with my family, it's what makes me the happiest. I've been asked more times than I can count "so are you going to hang up the snowboard?" Not a chance. If I do what does that say about me? Give up something that makes me so happy? Maybe tone it down...maybe. What example does that set for our kids? Give up when it gets tough?
No, no giving up. It's time to take the negative talk and prove, most importantly, to myself what I'm made of. How will I deal with this adversity? People struggle in life. We have all had our struggles. Some people have accidents and lose limbs forever, I've lost mine for a few months. Last time this happened I really let it get me down. This time I vow not to. This time I'm taking control of the situation. I share this with all of you because it's so important to never give up in the face of adversity. Because my injury could happen to anyone. We could get hurt working out, going for a hike, or anything that doesn't involve us sitting still wrapped in bubble wrap. Don't let adversity steal the joy from your life. I almos let it happen this time around. But I have an amazing support system in the people I've surrounded myself with. I will prevail because I have seen failure and gotten through it.